God can my life get any more fuck up then today. yeah i told my stepdad he was a son of a bitch because he made a promised to me that he would pay for college. but he back down his deal. then what made it wrost he cut me with a knife in my hand but i drop the knife before i did anything. then check this out he choke me for 25 secs. then beat me in the head for no reason.

Yeah people think i lie about my personly life. why would i so lie say that my life is fuck up huh? well face the facts bitches. i have a fuck up life. and why i dont have a boyfriend. well look at the father figure in my life. my father isnt around and dont care for my life right now.

then check this out. my mom didnt help. and then she laugh at me say i want fill my dream of acting. what so wrong with acting. i want to do it and i will do it. im going to push my self in to. i taught i didnt want to do anymore becuase it wasnt for me but ever since 6th grade i been try to act sick and i told my teach to fuck off and yes i was acting but they didnt care becuase they didnt sent me to dean at the time.*shurgs* oh well.

then to top that off i been get werid ass dreams about orlando bloom. dont asked. it just werid. it has me with him and talking and stuff and in movies together and dating. is that bad im scared.

also i can tell what going on. like what going to happen to me or something. it like that one show call ealry editon or something. where the guy get the paper to tell him what happen the next day. not me it in my brain. i knew my cousin was going to be in the hostpail and then about this rumor with orlando and Kate. okay i dont blieve it and my mind dont either.

Seriouly he can be friends with her and hold her hand after get a ride. but they if that a recent picture of them. why isnt on his sites or papers?*shurgs* my brother hold my hand when i get off scary rides or my cousin. that dont mean im dating him. but back to my point of the recent thing. if recent. why would he be in Cailforina while tory is still fliming. and suppoly kate is fliming somewhere else. then plus if they are"Dating" why would she go to the mtv movie awards alone and keep starting at josh Harrent? or then to the pemier of potc, maybe she was there but why were she near the carmans or near orlando. then why would orlando not be smiling like always. okay maybe that my conulicon on all this.yeah maybe he dont kiss and tell. but come on the fans have to know right?

okay yeah that all i have to get off my shoulder. and yes im going to be full fill my dreams with or without my family support. this my dream and i will do it.